for women and the men who love them
I’m not pregnant. But it wouldn’t be hard for me to get that way, and that’s kind of what this post is about. If you look at it another way, this post is about all women who could get pregnant and who are trying not to.
I’ve always wondered about people who believe depression to be solely rooted in a lack of faith. I’ve met and am related to a number of humans who think that other humans only get depressed when they aren’t worshiping God properly. That the reasons for depression couldn’t be biological. I also know and am related to a number of people who are depressed. How could I not be? A good number of my family either have thyroid disorders or they lived through the Lebanese Civil War (and more recent wars on Lebanese soil).
Often, as I just did, it’s easy to pinpoint the source of depression–if you know its possible causes. A slow thyroid leaves one lethargic and sad. Watching your friends and family picked off in war or living under the constant threat of bodily harm leaves one mentally scarred. Sure, you could say that a person of strong faith should shrug at the scars of war, but that’s not how it happens. Sometimes people need help in order to lift their shoulders, let alone shrug off a sizeable emotional load. Believe me. I know. What I’m writing about today is a possible cause that many, many men and women overlook. That cause is the reason I recently was depressed to the point of violent anger and frequently unable to scrape myself off the floor. It is also the reason I am no longer depressed.
You may already know to what I am referring. If you do, good for you. If you don’t, write this down. Two words: birth control.
Before we get into this, I’m not arguing for or against birth control. I’ve used it. I believed it was a religiously acceptable decision. I don’t think it’s for everyone. In fact, I don’t think it’s for most people, but that’s because of what it can do to the body, not because of what it prevents the body from doing.
When G was about one year old, Nathan and I made the decision that I should get an IUD. I’d taken birth control pills before. Like a high number of women, I was sensitive to them. I tried several different kinds. They made me anxious, angry, just plain moody, sad, lethargic, violent, explosive, and suicidal. I remember very clearly the afternoon I spent curled up on the floor or the prayer room in a campus building trying to hold down the urge to die. I called a doctor and was asked if I could make it to the end of the pill cycle. If I could, then I would just stop taking the pill at that point. If not, well, we didn’t talk about that. The option was basically to call 911 and have myself committed and put on suicide watch. By the grace of God (my faith was the thing that stopped me from jumping off something), I made it to the end of that cycle and never took a pill again.
You can imagine that I was quite hesitant about using any type of hormonal birth control after that, but with my boys growing, a difficult pregnancy and frightening delivery behind me, and the feeling that I truly had everything I could possibly want or need (alhumdulillah), I decided to try the IUD to prevent any unplanned pregnancies. It was a trust in God but tie your camel type of thing for me. But the rope I used to tie my camel almost hung me.
I consulted with my OB, and he told me that most women, even those with sensitivities to birth control pills, don’t usually have trouble with an IUD. I had a Mirena put in. Seven months later I found myself whimpering on the floor, my heart beneath me as depression took over at regular intervals. I suffered flashbacks, extreme outbursts, I started yelling at my children. I even had to fight myself so that I wouldn’t hit them. I wanted to hurt Noah sometimes, but God protected all of us. Sure, three year olds can be frustrating, but I was just that far gone.
I couldn’t figure out what was happening to me. So much in my life had changed. It was the same the first time I took birth control. I was suffering what I referred to as the “anti period.” My schedule was backwards. I had three weeks on cycle and one week off, with cramps the whole time. The pill reversed that and things were normal again. My cramping was eased, but I was crazy. I assumed it was normal to feel as full of hate as I did. After all, I was a teenager. Now I am riddled with regret for all of the horrible things I did during that time. I was not myself. I know that now.
I switched pills near when I got religiously married. I think the one I was taking was pulled off the market for the symptoms I experienced. The new pill made me anxious. Instead of considering the pill as a source of anxiety (as well as the source for my heart irregularities and migraines–read the warnings, people!), I was medicated for anxiety. The result? I developed acid reflux and was medicated for that.
I switched birth control again a year or two later. I was wondering if maybe my persistent anxiety had to do with all that was going into my system. I don’t know what woke me up to what was going into my body, but I’m grateful for whatever it was. I started yearning for a more natural approach to my body’s needs. It turned out that I was right about the source of my anxiety, but things only got worse.
I tried three different pills. The first made me moody. The second gave me headaches, I believe. The third brought me to the brink of killing myself. I went off the pill and tried Depo Provera injections. They took away my period (weird), but I was functional. Happier than I’d been in years and years, actually. But I didn’t like the unnatural lack of cycle it resulted in, so I went off that as well and used natural fertility methods. Not long after that, Noah became a twinkling in our eyes, then my womb, then a bright star guiding our lives. Next came Gabriel, and our lives were so full of joy we knew we didn’t need anymore. We’d rather appreciate our blessings.
So, we tried the Mirena.
I can’t express the level of sadness I feel when I think back on that choice. I was emotionally absent for nearly all of Gabriel’s firsts. I was intentionally mean to Noah, undermining his confidence and my own with the intense levels of anger coursing through my body at any moment. I was rude to my husband. I was a sad song for anyone who’d listen, constantly absorbed in worries that now seem minor. I was hateful to myself. I couldn’t feel happy. I couldn’t cry. I couldn’t truly love. I didn’t see the point in anything.
Nathan told me he thought it was the IUD. I went back to my OB after writing a blog post I will never publish. Dr. Stowell expressed concern and removed the IUD immediately. I was hesistant, but he brooked no arguments. He left the room and came back after only a minute prepared to yank the damn thing out. He did.
Just as the doctor told me, I felt better by that evening. Every day the fog cleared a little more. I started reading again. I watched Jane Eyre on Netflix and fell in love again. I cried over A Little Princess. I enjoyed the taste of food. I was happy to see my husband. I smelled my children and hugged them tighter than I knew I could. I experienced life again. Life is so beautiful. Every minute facet is a welling spring of wonder.
I am fortunate to have fallen in love with my husband and children again. I am curious how many new mothers start birth control and experience post partum depression. I also wonder how many men have watched as their mother, wife, sister or friend has fallen to pieces or been transformed into a different person entirely by the added hormones being released into her body.
I’m happy to answer questions on this topic. Too many times doctors don’t. I’m told many don’t know the effects that birth control can have. It’s easy to prescribe an anti-depressant or to turn one’s thoughts toward other possible factors, but my doctor said it best: “It’s better to take care of the external variables before you try to treat something internal.” Basically, medication should be the last step after eliminating any possible external cause for depression. Take your body back to zero before you try to fix it. There might not be anything that needs fixing.
Now that I’ve said that every possible way, let me suggest that if you do take birth control, you and your loved ones track any changes in your behavior. Don’t end up divorced or dead. Depression can easily lead to that. It’s not just hard for you inside your body, it’s hard for everyone outside of it.
Let me leave you with this to chew on: since my depression has lifted, most of the anger and anxiety Noah had has lifted. I like my husband again. I can look in my baby’s eyes and smile. I don’t have to struggle not to hurt someone emotionally or physically on an hourly basis. I am writing again, the way I’ve always wanted to.
Think about yourself and the women you know. Think about your families. Do your research. Knowledge is the key to success.
January 22nd, 2010 at 5:58 pm
Wow, what a great post. I’m Muslim. I’ve had hmmm similar issues in a way and yet completely different. I have PCOS. In other words I have hormonal issues. I finally went on a bc that helps lower testosterone. The rage vanished. My prescription ran out. I don’t have health insurance. Have an appointment to see a Dr. to get a new prescription…it takes months to get in. In the meantime everything else has been crumbling. I saw a psy. and have been put on anti-depressants. Things are so much better…almost back to the same old me. I wish I didn’t need the meds. I worry about if I will every get pg. I worry what will happen to me while I am pg and after…will I always need some meds and which ones? Will I be able to breast feed? If I do need meds will I get them fast enough….years have gone by and so many problems have come about because of my mood. I’ve been a horrible wife, friend, daughter……and my “marriage” was virtually non-existent. Pretty much all the non convert Muslims in my life seem to think that depression IS only an issue of faith (lack thereof). My issues and lack of understanding by others has caused so many problems. Though I feel so much better and this has helped my relationships I almost feel like all hope is lost. I can’t erase the years of craziness…..how can I rebuild all these relationships?
January 22nd, 2010 at 6:04 pm
This must have been a difficult post to write. Yet, once it was all written everything seemed clearer that BC was to blame.
I use Natural Family Planning not only because of my faith, but also because off all the horrible side effects of artificial birth control.
Couple to Couple League (http://ccli.org/) is a great resource about fertility etc.
I am so sorry that you had to go through all that anger! You’re still a wonderful wife and mama. I am sending you a book I think you’ll REALLY enjoy!
Take Care.
January 22nd, 2010 at 7:44 pm
Thanks for such an insightful post. Recently I have been looking into the effect of pills on a woman’s libido. I wonder if you can comment on that?
January 22nd, 2010 at 8:17 pm
Not gonna post it here– Thanks for having the strength to join the discussion! It is difficult because many relig groups find depression to be solely a matter of faith. I wonder how, when we KNOW that a factor (whether artifice or disease) can be introduced in the body which alters hormones and results in depression, we can still get on a high horse and claim that depression is completely spiritual. In the vein of tying one’s camel while trusting in Allah, I know Muslims who have taken anti-depressants in order to get to that clear-headed point where the spirit can be treated. The body is the host of the soul, so if the body ails, the soul does too, regardless of whether that ailment is biological or artificial!
I’m deeply sorry that you’ve struggled with this and that it has affected your reception in Islam. It’s ridiculous. No man (or woman) can know another man’s context. I’m happy to hear that birth control can be a solution for you. I’m actually thrilled that it can have the reverse effect of what I’ve experienced. Re: the long doctor wait–can you stop in at a Planned Parenthood, or would you be too uncomfortable to do that in the meantime?
I wish I could answer your questions about pregnancy and breastfeeding. You may find that pregnancy resolves (at least temporarily) your disorder. Of course, it could have the reverse effect. My pregnancies acted like birth control–leaving me anxious and angry. There is a Muslimah who now blogs privately about her experiences as bipolar and her journey into motherhood–off meds. She may be someone for you to know. And may God make this journey easy for you!
With regards to righting wrongs, I tend to stick with, “I’m not the same person I was then. I’m very sorry. I hope we can move forward, together.” If the person can be trusted further, you can delve further. If they don’t like that, you tried. No need to dredge up specifics unless they need to take a look at them. It seems unfair that something out of your control should result in this position, and I really hate saying this kind of thing, but it’s a test. It was given to you because you can deal with it, and God is just watching to see how you will do so. I sincerely hope that came across the right way! Again, may God make this easy for you!
The Ipps–It was. It took me a month to start once i resolved to. It’s personal and I prefer to remain in the category of blogger who does not provide TMI.
Thank you for the resource. I keep meaning to email so that I can learn more about Natural Family Planning. There is more than one way to tie a camel! Very, very excited about the book! Thank you!!!!!
Cosmic Cook–I’m going to potentially bite a bullet here and say the libido was nil. Worse, it only furthered the cycle of depression. Anxiety and depression are not friends of the libido. Not is anger that manifests toward your spouse. :/
January 22nd, 2010 at 9:12 pm
Ahh! Great topic.
I’ve been on BC for 3 years now. My doctor suggested I start using it due to hormonal issues I was having. I am currently taking Yasmine.
The first six months of taking the BC life was hell. I cried. I screamed. I was depressed. I made insane emotional decisions that compromised my integrity. Six months into all this I met with the chief Gyno. at the hospital. I explained to her the effects and the sudden weight gain. She explained that I was free to stop it anytime I wished. It was my choice, but was it really?
I chickened out. I kept taking it.
A year later I had my first panic attack.
The same year I started having the worst GI problems.
The same year I developed the worst PMS possible.
The same year I noticed my moods change severely.
The same year I went through my worst depression EVER (although outside circumstance were in to play, it exaggerate things I am sure of it).
The next year I was careless with taking the pills timely. I would pop 2 of the pills the same day. Sometimes before I went to bed which made the attacks worse. I was anxious. I was mean to the person I loved most. I became allergic to caffeine. I had every symptom in the world. I thought I was dying. I believed I was going crazy.
Heart palpitations, acid reflux, chronic stomach and digestive problems, cramps and severe depression were all caused by the BC.
**
I hate BC, but I am scared to stop taking them. I’ve managed to maintain my weight on them. I also have better skin and shorter periods.
So my significant other and I have developed an understanding about my cycle. I warn him in advance when the mood swings would kick in. He doesn’t take my episodes as serious anymore. He reminds me to take the pills in the morning, at the same time. I’ve started exercising to elevate the cramps and back pain. I drink more fluids. And most importantly–I am aware of what these pills can do to me and my relationships. It sucks because 1 week a month I am a Mad person.
**
At my next Gyno. appointment I plan to speak to my doctor about my options.
Thank you for this post
January 22nd, 2010 at 9:38 pm
To My Fan–
Thanks for sharing this. I had panic attacks as well as all the symptoms you mentioned on Yasmine. Actually, Yasmine was the bc on which I was suicidal. I pray that NEVER happens to you.
I would say that since you know these symptoms are due to birth control, you should go off it and perhaps request that your GYN refer you to a dietitian. Many women don’t know this is an option because doctors will tell you flat out that it’s not, but food sensitivities will affect hormones and so on. For me, dairy makes me lethargic, which puts me in a sad cycle, which feeds into my self-image and so on. It can also cause skin issues, etc. Of course, I don’t know your hormonal issues nor am I a doctor. I just know what’s true for me, and that it’s ALWAYS worth looking into the most basic issues. Too often we medicate to tweak some issue that is flaring up based on a lifestyle choice rather than a legitimate disorder. On the other side (because I’m all about flipping over the coin), so many people are denied help when they need it because doctors (and family!) don’t want to diagnose.
[Cheryl, if you're reading this and can chime in on food and hormones, please do.]
I’m very pleased to hear that you are aware of what’s happening and so is your significant other. It’s very difficult to hear from your loved ones “I’m not going to take this seriously because it’s the hormones talking” when you’re in it, but when you come out the other side, you’re so grateful that person was paying attention and doesn’t hate you for being your worst self.
It definitely is your choice to take these pills, but the doctor should have scheduled a follow-up during which you were told about different pills such as the estrogen-only pill given to nursing mothers post-partum. Again, there are injections and IUDs. The latter deliver the hormones directly to the uterus so it isn’t going all through your system, farking things up, then arriving at the goal. Do some research and go in with a plan. If you tell your doc what you’d like to know more about and why, it will help both of you.
On that note (and sorry this is so long), I brought the unpublishable blog post to my OB and it is now a permanent part of my file. It’s embarrassing and frightening, but it’s worth it. No doctor is going to rifle past that and allow me to take a pill again. Yeesh!
I pray that God eases this for you and your loved ones and forgives you for your sins, thereby removing them from your memory. What a mercy! I pray the same for Not gonna post it here. Amen.
January 23rd, 2010 at 2:25 am
thanks shawna
this was an informative post! BC’s one of those medical interventions that most people tolerate very well and the few who don’t get really severe side effects from. personally, i’ve never had any problems being on the pill even though i’m attributing at least 90% of my weight gain to it 
as for the decreased libido, i’m blaming uni and now, work!
January 23rd, 2010 at 2:28 am
hey, as salamu ‘alaykum
This was such a sad read and one that I am glad you shared with all of us. I will pass this around to other women.
I was on birth control for a few months and it was enough for me seeing that my period came every other week (although lighter and shorter). I’ve always been on time and regular and I knew that it couldn’t be good. I wasn’t into the natural lifestyle living at that time so I’m grateful that I noticed this.
I wasn’t on it long enough to notice any changes but I did experience some bad postpartum depression. I wonder if the medication, which I got on not long after he was born, played a role. I had a c-section and was given other meds so only Allah knows best. We must help educate each other!
January 23rd, 2010 at 3:10 am
Thank you for sharing.
You just gave me another reason to be wary of ABC. I’ve dealt w/ depression on and off for a long time, anything that can add to the problem is a no go. I don’t/won’t use it for religious reasons as well as health ones though so its kind of a moot point… except that I’m constantly getting grief about our decision… Anyways, I practice NFP like the other commenter on here & love it.
January 23rd, 2010 at 12:39 pm
Elia–Thank you, Doctor, for chiming in.
Umm Layth–wa alaikum asalaam! Thank you for passing this on. It’s sad that so many women are unaware of this particular side effect, as it undermines the spirit and can be so destructive. It was quite difficult to write, but insha’Allah it was the best thing to do.
Mama Kalila–Thank you for reading and commenting. I believe fertility is intensely personal and no one should be chiming in on another person’s decisions regarding it. I’m sorry you’ve had that experience. I’m very happy to hear you love NFP. Do you have a favorite resource you could share?
January 23rd, 2010 at 2:44 pm
Ohh wow, this is great. I don’t know where to start…I think I am going to start backwards haha. Yaz is the bc that I took that finally helped me out. Yaz is prescribed to women with PMDD and other issues. I wasn’t diagnosed with PMDD but I was given it because of my high testosterone levels. At this point my longest cycle w/o meds lasted almost six months!!
I have PCOS and was told my thyroid is on the large side (from physical exam) but my thyroid levels are fine. PCOS (poly cystic ovarian syndrome) is so tricky and it can show up differently in everyone that has it. For many years (and heck even today) most doctors don’t even diagnose it. If you are having problems with your cycle they just put you on bc to regulate it. A lot of the times doctors won’t even tell you that you have PCOS. In fact it was years ago before I was Muslim, before I was married that I suspected it. The dr. just told me that she thought I wasn’t ovulating and here are some pills. I knew deep down that “just not ovulating” didn’t sound quite right but since she was so laid back about it and acted as if it was nothing I assumed it wasn’t a big deal right now and it was something that could be easily taken care of in the future if need be. Most doctors it seems (from all the PCOS reading I have been doing)don’t usually bring up the issues surrounding PCOS unless the woman is actively trying to get pregnant. I think this is unfortunate because if these women knew sooner they would have problems they might have re-prioritized their lives or at least become more better informed in the mean time.
If I don’t take bc I don’t ovulate. If I don’t ovulate cysts begin to grow…and they can end up bursting or twisting an ovary, all sorts of things can happen so bc is really a preventative measure for that and helps with a some of the other symptoms of PCOS. However, if I want to get pregnant I need to get off the bc but then that means all sorts of other problems. Basically I need to see a reproductive endocrinologist and take more blood tests again and then take other pills to try to get me to ovulate there are plenty of appts that need to be made each month etc etc I don’t have health insurance but I belong to some hospital discount program so it takes months to get in just to see somebody. At this point I feel like I’ll never even get pg because of this. Sometimes when I think about it I feel defective.
An interesting group of vids on PCOS can be found by looking up “Mystery Diagnosis PCOS” on youtube. I know how hormones affect those of us with PCOS so I can only imagine what the rest of you had gone through while trying to “control” your healthy natural hormonal balance with bc.
About the whole depression/religion thing. It’s a topic I actually like to discuss a lot. For me, it seems most negativity or discouragement has mostly come from the immigrant community. More specifically members of the immigrant community I am close to since I don’t like to make everything public to everyone else LOL. (Though I know this takes place in every religious community and amongst American born ppl as well.) I think it’s a really sad thing on so many levels though it doesn’t surprise me terribly. On the one hand Muslims so long ago treated mental disorders in clinics so there is a history there to be remembered and on the other hand if you look for mental health practitioners in a Muslim majority country like Morocco they are hard to come by. An interesting article on the situation in Morocco can be found here: http://bit.ly/5qEU7n The numbers mentioned in that article aren’t really that surprising though if you take into acct how few doctors and dentists there are compared to the population in general.
Though my post is already 3 times as long as I wish it was I would like to also mention that I am looking forward to the day when there are more places like the ones I just learned about at http://www.fiqh.org/ that combines counseling as well as spiritual healing services in the DFW and Chicagoland areas. I had a friend in Chicago that was going to counseling for her intercultural marriage but had a hard time with her psychiatrist because of his blatantly prejudicial comments he made about Arab Muslim men (she’s a convert). She was emailing Muslim organizations all over and found a psychology professor in Chicago who happens to be Muslim who told her about a few places but said that it is something that is terribly lacking in our communities. I couldn’t agree more with what you said, “The body is the host of the soul, so if the body ails, the soul does too, regardless of whether that ailment is biological or artificial!”
Thanks for listening and the advice, I don’t know how I didn’t even think of planned parenthood.
January 23rd, 2010 at 2:48 pm
How could I forget? One of my closest friends (who has has PCOS and has been TTC for 9 years) has always promoted a book Taking Charge of Your Fertility (http://bit.ly/7THxVd). She says it should be required reading for every woman. I’ve found it at the library but I still need to buy my own copy.
January 23rd, 2010 at 3:55 pm
Oh my, there is so much to respond to! I wanted to recommend the book Taking Back the Month by Diana Taylor and Stacey Colino. I think it is out of print, but you should still be able to find it used through Amazon. It really helped me several years ago before I was on anti-depressants and would have cyclical anger and depression issues. I still need to use the PMS Charts it helped me designed to track my PMS symptoms throughout each month and make sure I take care of myself.
In general the foods that exacerbate PMS symptoms are the ones I tend to crave and rely upon: caffeine, salty foods, chocolate. I do allow myself to give in when I know I am PMSing and eat the foods I want to eat. Caffeine is particularly troubling though because I used to get really bad breast pain 2 weeks out of the month, and caffeine made it much worse, but I just cannot give up caffeine. I actually take Evening Primrose Oil 2 weeks before my period starts, and I think it has helped with the breast pain.
There has been some research that taking calcium and vitamin D supplements are supposed to help ease PMS symptoms, but I have not had that experience. I do take calcium and vitamin D every day for other reasons. The effect of dietary phytoestrogens (soy isoflavones, etc.) in humans is really unclear, so it’s hard to make any recommendations about soy and PMS.
January 23rd, 2010 at 9:20 pm
Calcium/magnesium and an herbal supplement called Vitex really helped me (to balance my hormones)…but it also helped me get pregnant which I don’t think is the outcome everyone else wants. Dong Quai is an herb that also helps with menstrual cramping and mood swings, and I’m pretty sure it’s not supposed to be a fertility booster. In all honesty, for those of us whose hormones are sensitive and so dramatically affected by hormonal birth control, it’s really time for the husbands to step up and use a condom. Otherwise there are female condoms, but they are much more difficult to use, and have to be fitted by a doctor, etc etc.
January 23rd, 2010 at 10:04 pm
Great post – and how wonderful you had a doctor and family who were so supportive. I had a bad experience as well (although more physical than emotional symptoms), and my doctor’s suggestion was to keep messing with different pills. I got so frustrated I went off of them on a whim (and again medical advice), and it was like a switch had been flipped. Within a month, most of my problems were gone, and I felt like a new person. I’m continually amazed by how many women suffer from terrible side effects from BC and, rather than addressing the problem, end up more strongly medicated. Women should have access to family planning materials, but we also need to consider what it is we continue to put into our bodies and environment.
To add to Melissa’s comment: I agree with men needing to take more responsibility – I was in one relationship where my supposedly loving boyfriend made comments on a somewhat regular basis about how ridiculous I was for not being on the pill (to be fair, I’ve heard similar things from female friends). But be careful with Dong Quai – I tried it once, and I had horrible side effects as result. And correct me if I’m wrong, but hasn’t there also been some preliminary research about how hormones from a variety of sources get into the environment and end up affecting everyone?
Thanks for sharing.
January 23rd, 2010 at 11:10 pm
I just want to add, on the topic of non-hormonal BC, that I used the sponge for awhile when my husband and I were first married. I got it at Walgreens, but I’m not sure they sell it anymore. It’s gone on/off the market a few times, so maybe it’s gone again. It worked really well, and didn’t affect sensation, which is why we didn’t use condoms after trying them once (sorry if that’s TMI!). I’ve heard diaphrams are good too, but they have to fitted by a doctor. Thanks to all of you for making me more aware of potential BC effects!
January 24th, 2010 at 12:52 pm
Lauren, I have read many articles over the past few years on fish changing their sex from all the bc hormones that are in the water. Freakyyyy. Here is a recent article: http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/11/25/eveningnews/main5778106.shtml . I have read others in the past that said certain fish were completely changing their sex from male to female and female to male.
January 24th, 2010 at 6:11 pm
Not gonna post it here: Thank you so much for all that information. I don’t know much about PCOS, but now I’m motivated to learn more, and to check out that book you recommended.
I’m very happy to hear you’re keeping the lines of dialogue open.
It can be such a challenge, but is very necessary to educate the uneducated.
Cheryl–Thanks for that info. I’m motivated to take a big step back from caffeine. One big challenge I face is unlearning angry behaviours, and I think caffeine may be a culprit.
Melissa–If it boosts your fertility, I’m staying VERY far away from it. With regards to asking men to step it up, this may be TMI, but in this house we have sensitivities to ALL types of artificial birth control.
You know what (this is addressed toward The Ipps to based on their most recent blog post), I actually don’t think it matters if you use ABC or not to prevent pregnancy. I don’t believe conception happens unless God wills it, and I think it will happen regardless of birth control measures if He has decided it will. I’ve known plenty of women who got pregnant while on birth control, even when it was used correctly. Pills, IUDs, condoms, foams, etc–none of it is 100% effective. I guess that’s why I don’t believe it’s wrong to take it. I also don’t believe it’s USELESS to take it. I say that because I do believe that one takes the first step toward God, and then God comes to meet you. Birth control measures can be that first step, whether artificial or natural. You make your wishes known. In the end, God knows what you can and can’t handle, thus pregnancy happens regardless.
Too fatalistic? I mean, there’s always measures that can be taken post-knowledge of pregnancy. I’m not getting into what I think of that here, though. I’ll just say that I believe things happen for a reason, and it’s how we deal with the events that make up our lives that results in our position in the afterlife.
Lauren–Thank you so much! I’m very disturbed about what you and NGPIH have shown with regards to BC and the environment. I’m a firm believer in less is more. I lean toward natural whenever possible in this world of synthetics. I’d like to learn more about the effects of artificial birth control on the environment versus the strong push from the green movement to limit the number of children one has.
January 24th, 2010 at 6:13 pm
tsarina–thank you for sharing. I’ve never heard about the sponge before. I’m glad this forum has been of use to you!
January 24th, 2010 at 6:32 pm
tsarina – the sponge is still available, at least online as I haven’t seen it in a store in a while. There was a time when it was taken off the market for years(it actually became a subject of a Seinfeld episode). At that time many women online were ordering different sponge brands from Canada. I guess a lot of women swear by it. I believe the only brand being sold in America right now is the “Today Sponge”. I’m gonna start searching but there was actually a site I used to use that had the sponge from Canada and some other non hormonal bc that was available in other countries but not to us in the U.S. If I find it I will come back and post.
January 24th, 2010 at 6:44 pm
Well, I think the site no longer exists but I did find one of the items similar to the other ones I remembered. It’s called Lea’s contraceptive. It doesn’t need to be fitted either. One could probably buy it someplace online but you can read some info on it here: http://www.yourcontraception.com/birth-control-methods/vaginal-contraception/leas-contraceptive.html
January 24th, 2010 at 6:51 pm
Well, turns out Lea’s Shield was discontinued however, for those of you with normal cycles who would like non hormonal methods I do suggest to keep looking. I do remember there being more options similar to the cap and diaphragms being sold in Canada and Europe with some that could be ordered online, I have come across them every now and then over the years.
January 25th, 2010 at 1:08 pm
[...] « for women and the men who love them [...]
January 26th, 2010 at 4:08 pm
Shawna: I agree. We need to find the happy medium between not overpopulating the earth but also not poisoning our bodies and environment with artificial hormones.
And on that subject, an article from the L.A. Times today about household chemicals and fertility: https://mail.google.com/mail/?shva=1#inbox/1266c1c3e6eb653c.
February 12th, 2010 at 10:04 pm
[...] & Nutrition by Marilyn M. Shannon (thanks Megan!)–A great read for those reached by this post. It carefully examines natural solutions for fertility [...]